Monday, December 10, 2012

advent 2012


Advent is hard for me. It’s the active remembrance of 400 years of silence and suffering squished into 4 weeks and it feels concentrated and heavy in parts. I was dong okay with it up until yesterday when we had a meeting at church saying that we aren’t going to keep being able to pay our pastor if things keep up the way they’ve been going and I can’t internalize that quite yet because it makes me so scared. This community has been the biggest gift for me after we left our church of 12 years. Leaving that church involved a lot of heartache and now the possibility of my lifesaving community going away is breaking my heart. The problem is everyone in the community is broke. And money shouldn’t even be an issue. We (Wits’ End is the name of the church) live really low to the ground. The pastor is abhorrently underpaid of course and has three small kids (of course) and today I’m sitting with the memories from the church situation two years ago in which a family was removed from staff and treated as if the church didn’t want them to be their problem anymore. That's not what's happening here at Wits' End; quite the opposite - the pastor and his kids are very much wanted but we can't even afford to underpay them. It's a trauma stressor I suppose and is reminding me of the spiritual and emotional fallout from the church stuff two years ago that has been devastating for everyone who’s had to watch, and it makes me wish very much I was in the position where I didn’t have to see any of this if I didn’t elect to. I hope I would still elect to though. But these realities are ugly and I am feeling Advent heaviness even harder today. This Wits’ End community has been a livesaving godsend for me and they’re my only family nearby and I hate that their existence is at risk so this is what I’m sitting with now.

Now that I’ve said all this I feel better, thanks.

Tuesday, November 27, 2012

things uncle richard said during thanksgiving 2012

“It would be freeing for you girls to walk around in a burqua so you’d get to be appreciated for your minds. Maybe.”
“I have no idea what my wifi password is. Don’t ask me. Why do I even need to have a password? Anyone who wants to use my internet is welcome to.”
“I’m just trying to make you uncomfortable till you get out of my seat.”
“See, because they don’t have Obama’s birth certificate they aren’t sure he was born.”
“You’re writing down what I’m saying again? How do you separate the wheat from the chaff?”
“I was getting concerned that I have empathy for Mitt Romney, but I could tell he has Aspberger’s too.”
“I don’t look people in the eye. I can tell you all about their teeth, though.”
“I don’t want to get on Facebook. I’d feel like a traitor to my race.” Me: “To the Jewish race?” R: “No, the human race!”
“I’m not good at it (sex), and it’s as simple as that.”
“So that law passed! Are the streets of Seattle all filled with dope smokers now?”
“I’ve always known I wanted to be old. You don’t know anything till you’re old. I want to have done everything and have nothing left to do.”
“You never tell the truth when a woman asks certain questions. I mean, come on.”
“YOU’VE NEVER HEARD OF LAURA NYRO?!”
“I’m an Asperger’s survivor. I feel great, but it’s how other people feel about me that’s the problem.”
“We haven’t locked our front door in 36 years. I wouldn’t live in a place where I had to lock my door. But I did stop leaving my keys in the car after it got stolen twice.”
“If you read your bible carefully, you’ll learn that Botox adds to your time in purgatory.”
To Conney Mae: “I’m not going to get that platter down, I just got up from my nap!” Whispering to us: “I just defused a volatile situation.”
“Two things I did in my life I did right: I got the right bathtub and I got the right TV.”
“You know how it excites me when you say whipped!”
“We need a designated coffee fetcher.”
“They make stuff badly on purpose so it breaks and you’ll actually say ‘Oh good, I get to buy another!’ It’s vicious.”
To Judah: “Commercials allow people to make money off you, which is the only reason you exist.”
“I can’t imagine what kind of pervert would want chocolate ice cream on their pumpkin pie.” (this was said by Conney Mae)
“You guys are making me want to be religious. You’re so hateful about religion that it sounds fun.”
“Just pack that gluten in.”
(looking at the remnants of pizza) “Boy, what a bunch of rapists.”
“I was confident Obama would win but at the end fear overcame belief because the prospect of Romney as president is horrifying. 48% voted for Romney? That’s a hate vote if I ever saw one. You think the Civil War has ended, just look at the election results.”
“You should reserve daviddruryisanasshole.com.”
“In the ‘50s I’d go to the annual charity game on the polo grounds in Manhattan. There used to be little bridges you could walk across the river from the Bronx to Manhattan. Roy Campanella was my favorite. Played for the Brooklyn Dodgers, he was a catcher. He was in a car crash and was paralyzed. Ended his career, of course. Man.”
“I’m good! Well, I’m grumpy but that won’t affect you. You just asked how I am.”
(Sets down an orchid from his greenhouse in front of me.) “This orchid just opened today, so this is in honor of you guys. Look at that guy. He’s got a little purple lip. Not all orchids smell, but some smell like the ocean to me.”
Me: “Judah was 9 lbs 12 oz when he was born.” R: “That must have smarted.”
“I used to get sick to my stomach after kissing girls because I was allergic to their lipstick. I was worried! What’s wrong with me? I’d kiss a girl and get nauseous.”
“I always wanted to die on the pitcher’s mound.”
“Well, I’ve decided that you can’t go. I’ve always wanted a biographer.”

Friday, August 10, 2012

peter rollins & jay bakker


Here is a talk that Peter Rollins had with Jay Bakker a few weeks ago and I just loved it so much. The audio is here but I wrote out my favorite parts for posterity and also interested parties. 

Peter: “The law says ‘no, don’t don’t don’t’ with the idea that that’ll make you a better person. Some people in the church seem to think that love is an uber-no, you get these churches that have these discipline contracts and all of this like “if I say no enough that’ll change their behavior.” Whereas love is really kind of a big yes. Everything is permissible. Not everything is beneficial, but everything is beneficial. It’s a huge yes. Don’t feel guilty, don’t feel bad, just bring to the surface everything in a community of love that accepts you. [Then people go] “What? No, then people would just do anything they want.” No no no, the trick is this: the very place that you start to overcome the guilt that you’re not doing something is the very point that you’re more able to enter into the doing of it. So where you think the guilt is the very thing that’s making you do something – “I’d feel guilty so therefore I will do the right thing” – you actually take away the guilt and you are actually able to live into a more gracious and beautiful life over time.” (At about minute 29:00)

At about minute 33: “Sin for example is nothing to do with morality. …Sin comes from the term separation so it’s a sense that I’m separated from something that will make me whole and complete. … The law then comes in and it makes that even crazier. …The sense of separation which makes you want something combined with the prohibition that says you can’t have it generates the idea that that thing will really make me happy. It’s the core of the work that I do, right?  …Any object that makes you think you’ll be whole and complete is the idol so if you think God can make you whole and complete, God is the idol.”

At about 39:00 “I think what the role of the leader is is to say ‘I don’t know, we’ve got to work this out together. Let’s create a mature environment in which we can confront the very real issues that surround us and how best we think we can respond to the call. What is the call? The call is the other person’s face. The call is the other person’s humanity. How do we respond to that call?’”

At about 41:00: “Singer/songwriters and professional comedians, these are people who confront us with ourselves. So when you listen to a musician who is singing about brokenness, they’re not destroyed by it, they’re singing about it, they’ve in a sense robbed it of its sting. And as we listen to them sing about their brokenness, we come into contact with our own. We begin to work through it. If we had a direct confrontation with it we might crack up and die, but somehow the singer/songwriter is the one who weeps through music and like Kierkegaard says their lips are formed so that when the sigh and cry pass through them, it sounds like lovely music. And we then come into contact with our own brokenness. Comedians do a similar thing, they talk about the brokenness of their lives and laugh about it and help us encounter it. For me, the role of the church collective is that prayer and music brings us to a confrontation with ourselves. The idea that we are haunted houses, that we are full of ghosts of the ones we’ve loved and lost, the ones we’ve hurt, the ones who have hurt us, and it helps us confront the fact that we’re haunted houses and that the ghosts are there not because they can’t let go of us but because we can’t let go of them. And that’s the kind of community that’s offensive in all of the right ways.” Jay: “But without anxiety?” Peter: “Well, you bring the anxiety to the surface. You know, the things that you try to hold down, the false narrative that you use to talk about yourself, the ‘I’m all right, I’m fine, I’m sorted, everything’s good’ which you see cracks in when you’re dreaming at night, you have nightmares or you have a few drinks and see the stuff that seeps out. Our waking life is ironically our dream life, right, so this dream life that we’re in, the rule of the collective is to wake us up a little bit from that. Not so that we get depressed about our brokenness, but so that we overcome it, rob it of its power.”

46:00 Jay: “The church has become a place where they say ‘Be transparent’ but as soon as you are you know you’re going to have to pay a price for that transparency, which causes you not to be honest anymore.”  Peter: “If you are just able to repress one part of you through the sheer knowing of the law and sheer self will, it will come out in other ways. But if you begin to work through and bring it to the surface the idea is it is not going to manifest in other unhealthy symptoms.”

Peter was in town this week and we saw him yesterday
and my daughter drew him a picture of a toilet.


Monday, August 6, 2012

my 7 yr old's complaints about her cereal this morning

I hate that kind.
I didn’t hate it when I picked it out in the store but I hate it now.
I can’t pour it myself.
I can’t pour the milk myself either.
Daddy always pours it right.
Daddy pours gooder than you.
Stop when I say stop.
Okay, stop.
THAT’S TOO MUCH!
(crying) You ruined it!
No, you CAN’T make it even by putting more cereal in.
I’m NOT eating it.
NOW YOU PUT IN TOO MUCH CEREAL!
(picks out wet cereal and puts it on the counter)
I can’t eat it.
I need a new bowl.
No, don’t call daddy.
Daddy, mommy pours it awful.
I can’t eat it unless I get a new bowl and start over.
Okay, I’ll eat it. But I won’t like it.
*scene ends with everyone in tears*

Wednesday, August 1, 2012

i stole a rosary


I talked about it on this podcast episode, and also about spending with with evangelical people and how that is for me these days. (Ugh. But...yeah.) And on the subject of my illegitmate rosary, I wrote my own rosary for it and I told my friend Heather last night that I assigned a bead for her on there and she said "No matter how bad a day I'm having I can always remember i'm a bead on Stephanie's rosary!" That made me so happy. The end.

Sunday, July 22, 2012

uncle richard

David's uncle Richard is so quotable that I write down his stuff and post it on Facebook - here is the link:

"I don't understand why Obama calls himself black."
"I don't play fantasy baseball. That would only work for me if it were somehow connected to gambling."
"I think Sarah Palin is perfectly suited to be the Lenscrafters spokesperson and nothing more than that."
(lighting another smoke) "I don't need to live long. I wanna live till I want to die and then just let me die."
"Like most things it comes down to 'it's not worth the effort.' That's the bottom line for me."
"I've got an excuse now. Asperger's! I went to Portland and got diagnosed and now I have an excuse for every shitty thing that I do."
"This bluejay comes and visits me every day while I'm gardening. Well, I can't swear it's the same bird but I pretend it is."
"Holy shit, we need to get some more tequila. We're gonna finish this shit off quick."

"Dogs don't truly love people."
Me: "Do you have any documentation on that?"
"Yes."

Uncle Richard quotes I curated last night:

 "Making money is a bitch. It is a BITCH. So is testosterone."
"The Dhali Lama seems like a tremendously Aspberger's guy."
"I'm wearing an Obama-Biden shirt to the [evangelical Christian] family reunion. I've decided I'm just going to be a sandwich board all week."
"I need a fork. It doesn't have to be clean."
"When I saw Black Beauty on the marquee in Det...roit in 1972 I thought it was a porno."
"Humor is legitimate lies."
"Her first husband was stone gay."
"I'll stop smoking when my body says it's time to stop smoking. But if you dig up a 70 year old water pipe, it's gonna be corroded."
"I threw my red plastic Emerson radio out the window when Bobby Thompson hit the home run in 1951 and won the World Series. And I'd do it again."
"I grew up in the best of times. I'd sit in the outfield bleachers at the home run derby and Ted Williams would hit them over my head."
"I can't wrap my mind around Twitter. You can tweet anything about anyone and then you're automatically part of the market economy."
"I don't think they should take away any man's vote, even the child molesters."
[To the boxing play-by-play announcer] "Wah wah wah." [Changes to Pakistani man yammering] "Well, this is even worse."
"I can't type because if I make a typo I have to fix it and then I lose my train of thought."
"I was a denizen of breaking into the Bronx zoo. They might as well have made a cage for me too."
"I can't play music but I know what I like. Oh hey, I left some meat on the grill."
[On David getting disinvited from Mars Hill Church on account of being married to me] "Getting banned from a church is like getting kicked out of the ladies' room at a gay bar. Which I did. Got kicked out because I wanted a cigarette and Conney had the matches."
"I have great stories, but they only have titles."

Monday, July 2, 2012

two things

This by Joan Didion is so beautiful, her quote about why she writes:
“I write entirely to find out what I’m thinking, what I’m looking at, what I see and what it means. What I want and what I fear. Why did the oil refineries around Carquinez Straits seem sinister to me in the summer of 1956? Why have the night lights in the bevatron burned in my mind for twenty years? What is going on in these pictures in my mind?” (from this article)
And Duncan Trussell's podcast with a spiritualist/philosopher/gay porn star Did Something to me. The way he and Duncan talked about spirituality and existing in the tension between the spiritual and the physical resonated with me so crazily and I don't think I am the same since listening to this. (interview with Duncan Trussell and Conner Habib is here)

Monday, June 11, 2012

crashing noises in the night

Last night while David was gone and Lolly was sleeping Judah and I were reading in bed when we heard stuff being thrown around in the kitchen really loudly. Instead of calling the police I called David in the studio (miracle that he answered) and told him that robbers were ransacking our house and could he please come home and scare them away. Judah and I huddled together hoping that the serial killers wouldn’t think to look for us (“I hope the doorknob doesn’t turn”) when David finally came home and found the eggs I’d left boiling on the stove had exploded all over the kitchen. The house smells really great now and I feel really smart. I should be on “I Shouldn’t Be Alive”!

Tuesday, June 5, 2012

the stuff christian culture likes plugged in movie review of the week™

Focus on the Family reviews movies for any and all offensive content and it’s the most hilarious thing ever. Here’s my favorite this week.

The Stuff Christian Culture Likes Plugged In Movie Review of the Week™ is…“Dr. Seuss’ The Lorax!” Highlights include:

Spiritual content: “The Lorax might be taken as some sort of divine messenger.”

Sexual content: “Animated characters wear bikinis. Ted dreams of kissing Audrey—but never quite pulls it off.”

Violent content: “Truffula trees suffer the worst abuse in “The Lorax” but the film’s assortment of fauna don’t get off scot-free, either.” “The head of a statue gets sliced off.” “A donkey occasionally kicks people. Other animals make threatening moves toward the Once-ler before they’re distracted by…marshmallows.”

Crude or profane language: “There’s an unfinished “what the …?” and a use or two each of “gosh” and “darn.” Name-calling includes “weirdo,” “idiot,” “loser,” “dirt bag,” “beanpole,” “furry meatloaf” and ”crazy baby man.”

Drug and alcohol content: “None, though commercials for Mr. O’Hare’s bottled air mimic (and mock) the over-the-top glamour we sometimes see in real-world ads for beer.”

Other negative elements: “Once-ler breaks a promise to the Lorax and the rest of his woodland friends. A bird lays an egg in one of Once-ler’s bowls (grossing him out). The Lorax brushes his teeth with Once-ler’s toothbrush. We witness incredibly poor eating habits.”

Conclusion:The Lorax has already generated a bit of controversy, with Fox Business commentator Lou Dobbs taking it to task for trying to “indoctrinate our children”…with an unmistakable (and at times even heavy-handed) environmental message.” “For families really in need of those 94 minutes of distraction—and aren’t put off by the environmental preachiness—The Lorax is a solid choice.”

Monday, June 4, 2012

fr. richard rohr

I've been preoccupied with St. Francis of Assisi lately and am reading Richard Rohr's stuff about him. Read this this morning on the way to work and it quite cheesily took my breath away.

Dying is not extraneous to life; it is part of the mystery. And you do not understand life until you stand under death. Yet both sides of the mystery must be experienced and trusted. The Eastern religions speak of the yin and yang of things; nature religions simply speak of darkness and light; the Jewish people speak of slavery and deliverance; we Christians speak of death and resurrection. But we are all pointing to God’s universal pattern of trust and transformation. This is rightly spoken of as being “reborn,” but has less to do with an emotional Church experience than a realigning life experience.


Yes, God is dying in all things, but God is risen in all things too. And both at the same time! There is suffering in all things, as the Buddhists so honestly say. There’s ecstasy in all things, as the Sufis so honestly say. There are both wild beasts and angels in the wilderness of human life, as the Gospels say. People who see “the better angels of our nature” (Abraham Lincoln) while not avoiding “the essentially tragic nature of human existence” (Miguel de Unamuno) are always the seers, the mystics, the prophets, the Great Souls, the fuel that keeps history advancing. —Richard Rohr, Hope Against Darkness: The Transforming Vision of Saint Francis in an Age of Anxiety

Saturday, May 26, 2012

church violence and healing and stuff

Ahhhhh tomorrow I'm going to share some of my story at church. Our pastor (I don't really like that word, negative connotations I guess, but I really like this guy) asked some of us to share part of our spiritual journey in observance of Pentecost and I'm totally excited to share it and also totally scared. I've told my story a little bit and I feel like I heal a little more every time I tell it and I also feel like I help open a bit of a way for others to heal when I say it out loud. It's still the worst though. Well, the worst and the best. So many great things happened in wake of the awful things that happened. Tomorrow I'll be focusing on how I got to the faith community I'm at now and what happened leading up to it was the second most painful thing I've been through. I still feel pain from it and I probably always will, how could I not, but as I tell it tomorrow I'll have to open myself back up to the violence that caused us to leave our old church so I'm getting ready for that.
There's no good way to end this. Hey, my podcast is on iTunes. We talk about wieners and Taco Bell.

Thursday, May 17, 2012

three things real quick

Oh hi! I have exactly three things I've been meaning to post about all week! Put your helmets on boys and girls (no, don't):

1. Simone's and my podcast Dongtini just got picked up by a podcast collective that I love and am excited about so YAY.

2. I talked to this lady I like, Ronna Detrick, and the conversation is here in case you've got an hour and want to hear. We talked about spiritual stuff, mainly. She was married to a pastor for a long time and they're not married anymore and she got her M.Div and has been though all kinds of things and we talked about feminism and theology. It was fun.

3. David wrote this bio for Dongtini and I laughed so hard I almost threw up:

“If you can have your pearl necklace and clutch it too, Stephanie Drury and Simone Turkington have a podcast for you to barely stomach. This podcast is a cry for help. That cry is, “We thirst for attention. And cock. But mostly attention.” Stephanie and Simone would like to be thwacked about the face and lips with ample and stately land-owning dongs while wearing fanciful party dresses that nobody can stop talking about. They would like their drinks to be stirred with dongs, their hair to be teased with dongs, and their various whorish shades of lipstick generously applied with dongs. Yours will do just fine. Get in line. These girls take all comers. Whatever the Statue of Liberty says to the boat people, Stephanie and Simone say to dongs.”

Wednesday, May 2, 2012

dongtini: transcontinental australian edition

On this episode: Transcontinental fortitude! Simone calls in from her snack nest in Australia and talks about the Aussie version of white trash (bogans). I am busted for humblebragging and then get sad that atheists call me dumb, a stranger shows Simone her nipple ring, and nothing is more hilarious than hipsters at the gym. Here or on iTunes.

Wednesday, April 25, 2012

new dongtini! episode 41

On this episode: I'm creeped out by CuddleParty.com, Best Western is bravely admitting their customers cover remote controls with DNA, Christians criticizing other Christians for living in the gray, Simone asks me what if none of this religion stuff is true, spin class rage, the split-level was a horrible assault on architecture, and a listener saw a porn shoot by the side of the highway. Download here or find it on iTunes here.

Friday, April 20, 2012

atheist

I have an atheist friend who is antagonistic towards me sometimes. It makes me feel disconnected from him and small. I don't know how to handle it. I wish he was softer. I completely understand that my mystical views are weird to him. I come from the perspective where I embrace things I don't understand all the way and I like to wonder a lot. I think that this is really strange to him and I feel like he doesn't respect it. But I need him to respect it just like I feel I respect what resonates with him. But if he wants concrete answers, he's not going to be able to get them from me because I see things in a way that there are things beyond my understanding and I have peace with that and also curiosity towards that. I feel like he thinks I'm a total dumbass for thinking that way. I really like exploring what the meaning could be behind things that I don't understand. I often have a strange peace when things don't tie up in a tidy knot but I completely understand that is not the way it is for him. Anyway, the root of my grief here is that I feel like he doesn't respect it because he doesn't understand it. I wonder how I can communicate this to him without him freaking out. I don't know how to approach it. Thoughts?

Thursday, April 19, 2012

letter from a concerned follower

Letter #1

John Carpenter, M.Div., Th.M, Ph.D. sent you a message about your petition, Hey Liberty University, Drop Driscoll:


"Leave Mark Driscoll alone. We're talking a group to see him and we don't appreciate your attempts to suppress the preaching of God's Word. Repent."


Letter #2

"Hi John,

thanks for writing with you concerns about our petition. We are a group dedicated to helping spiritual abuse victims and to seeing Mark Driscoll's influence significantly decreased.  We are also interested in staying in the room with disagreement and having dialogue with those the church would deem outsiders. Here is our strategy (strategery): I met with social justice groups over the past week after news outlets have failed to pick up any of the spiritual abuse stories coming out of Mars Hill church. It's alarming that Driscoll has a bestselling book on godly marriage while at the same time alarming stories from behind the scenes of his church have been coming out on sites like Jesus Needs New PR and Joyful Exiles and Mars Hill Refuge, to name just three. We've emailed major papers and news sites to ask them to spotlight the testimonies of insider experiences coming out of Mars Hill, and the only one who would pick up the story was The Stranger. Not Christianity Today, not any of the Timeses type papers - no one.

So to raise curiosity about a problem (emotional and spiritual devastation coming out of Mars Hill church) that we have seen for years in our community and now spreading nationwide as Driscoll's fame and Acts 29 church network grows, we need to spark curiosity about what is happening behind the scenes. If demand is created then news outlets will cover these devastating stories of people who were once on the inner circle of Mars Hill church. Since Driscoll is a national bestseller and getting lots of media attention we decided to petition Liberty University to rescind their invite for Driscoll to speak on their campus on April 20th. We think that would get the conservatives and fundamentalists engaged as well. Once the truth is brought to light then healing can begin, as any survivor will tell you.

Thanks for your concern and fight for truth to be exposed for the sake of freedom and healing.

Stephanie Drury, M.A., M.Div., Th.M, Ph.D., DDS, Esq."


Letter #3

"Hi Stephanie,

By your own admission, your goal is to see 'Mark Driscoll's influence significantly decreased'. That comes first. Then you go looking for accusations to help you with that. Please repent of your rumor mongering and find something productive to do.

I don't believe you care about the 'truth' or the sake of Jesus Christ. Please repent and deal with your own problems.

Sincerely,

John B. Carpenter, M.Div., Th.M., Ph.D."


Letter #4

"I only repent when instructed to do so by properly credentialed authorities. And I think you're a giant dick, actually.

In his grip,
Stephanie Drury, M.A., M.Div., Th.M, Ph.D., DDS, Esq., WebMD, D.O.N.G"


Letter #5

"Delivery to the following recipient failed permanently:  John B. Carpenter, M.Div., Th.M., Ph.D."

Thursday, April 5, 2012

please consider signing my moveon.org petition about mark driscoll

So yesterday I helped create a moveon.org petition to request Mark Driscoll be uninvited from speaking at Liberty University on April 20. The petition is sponsored by Sophia's Voice, which is a group dedicated to helping spiritual abuse victims and to seeing Mark Driscoll's influence significantly decreased.  We are also interested in staying in the room with disagreement and having dialogue with those the church would deem outsiders. Here is our strategy (strategery): I met with social justice groups over the past week after news outlets have failed to pick up any of the spiritual abuse stories coming out of Mars Hill church. It's fucked up how Driscoll has a bestselling book on godly marriage while at the same time alarming stories from behind the scenes of his church have been coming out on sites like Jesus Needs New PR and Joyful Exiles. We've emailed major papers and news sites to ask them to spotlight the testimonies of insider experiences coming out of Mars Hill, andl the only one who would pick up the story was The Stranger. Not Christianity Today, not any of the Timeses type papers - no one.

So to raise curiosity about a problem (emotional and spiritual devastation coming out of Mars Hill church) that we have seen for years in our community and now spreading nationwide as Driscoll's fame and Acts 29 church network grows, we need to spark curiosity about what is happening behind the scenes. If demand is created then news outlets will cover these devastating stories of people who were once on the inner circle of Mars Hill church. Since Driscoll is a national bestseller and getting lots of media attention we decided to petition Liberty University to rescind their invite for Driscoll to speak on their campus on April 20th. We think that would get the conservatives and fundamentalists engaged as well. Once the truth is brought to light then healing can begin, as any survivor will tell you.

Here's the link petition. Do with it what you will. No pressure! I just wanted to tell you cause we need signatures. We want 5,000. We think that is the Lord's will. heh

Petition for Liberty University to disinvite Driscoll

xo
stephy

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

the most beautiful letter

If we could all have and be friends like this...

[see the letter here]

Sunday, February 19, 2012

judah made a trading card of lolly's bad mood

It might be the first in a series: The Many Moods Of Rilian™

Tuesday, February 7, 2012

a franciscan prayer my friend hugh sent me

A Franciscan Blessing

May God bless us with discomfort at easy answers, half-truths and superficial relationships,

So that we may live deep in the heart of God

May God bless us with anger at injustice, oppression and exploitation of people,

So that we may work for justice, freedom and peace

May God bless us with tears to shed for those who suffer from pain, rejection, starvation and war,

So that we may reach out our hand to comfort them and turn their pain to joy.

May God bless us with enough foolishness to believe that we can make a difference in this world,

Amen

Tuesday, January 31, 2012

wow

"Age has given me what I was looking for my entire life - it has given me ME. It has provided time and experience and failures and triumphs and time-tested friends who have helped me step into the shape that was waiting for me. I fit into me now. I have an organic life, finally, not necessarily the one people imagined for me, or tried to get me to have. I have the life I longed for. I have become the woman I hardly dared imagine I could be. There are parts I don't love - until a few years ago, I had no idea that you could have cellulite on your stomach - but not only do I get along with me most of the time now, I am militantly and maternally on my own side... how kind to myself I have become, what a wonderful, tender wife I am to myself, what a loving companion." —Anne Lamott

Thursday, January 26, 2012

i read this poem every morning. in case anyone cares.


We are the music makers,
And we are the dreamers of dreams,
Wandering by lone sea-breakers,
And sitting by desolate streams;—
World-losers and world-forsakers,
On whom the pale moon gleams:
Yet we are the movers and shakers
Of the world for ever, it seems.

—Arthur O'Shaughnessy, “Ode” from “Music & Moonlight”

Monday, January 16, 2012

things judah (age 10) said while watching "raising arizona" with me just now

"Is this going to be scary? What's it rated? Hmm. Are you sure?"

"Why'd she want to marry a criminal?"

"It's been going for 30 minutes and they FINALLY ran the title credits?"

"That is a high, high ceiling." (in the Huffhines' living room)

"Does the baby get back to their parents at the end?" Me: "I don't want to ruin it for you." "MOM, SERIOUSLY, PLEASE!"

"That's an awesome playroom for the babies. They're lucky."

"I think blue and orange are my favorite colors for M&Ms."

"I hate those kids. Can you imagine if the Supernanny got ahold of them?"

"Has it been an hour already? This is going as fast as Karate Kid!"

"This is a chaotic moment." (when Hi hijacks the van)

Me: "What if we got a wiener dog and named it Waffles?" Judah: "We'd have to discuss it over dinner."

"Get to the point!" (during Nathan Sr.'s monologue in the nursery)

"Hey, they all have manners now! Well, it's in his dream. It must have taken forever to get that shot."