Thursday, January 3, 2008

last night's top ten list for striking writers

NEW YORK (AP) -- Striking television writers delivered David Letterman's Top 10 list, "Demands of the Striking Writers," on his show Wednesday:

10. "Complimentary tote bag with next insulting contract offer" -- Tim Carvell, from "The Daily Show."

9. "No rollbacks in health benefits, so I can treat the hypothermia I caught on the picket lines" -- Laura Krafft, from "The Colbert Report."

8. "Full salary and benefits for my imaginary writing partner, Lester" -- Melissa Salmons, writer for daytime TV.

7. "Members of the AMPTP must explain what the hell AMPTP stands for" -- Warren Leight, writer for "Law & Order: Criminal Intent."

6. "No disciplinary action taken against any writer caught having inappropriate relationship with a copier" -- Jay Katsir, from "The Colbert Report."

5. "I'd like a date with a woman" -- Steve Bodow, from "The Daily Show."

4. "Hazard pay for breaking up fights on 'The View' " -- from writer and director Nora Ephron.

3. "I'm no accountant, but instead of us getting 4 cents for a $20 DVD, how about we get $20 for a 4-cent DVD?" -- Gina Johnfrido of "Law & Order."

2. "I don't have a joke. I just want to remind everyone that we're on strike, so none of us are responsible for this lame list" -- Chris Albers from Conan O'Brien's "Late Night."

1. "Producers must immediately remove their heads from their -----" -- author Alan Zweibel.

*****

I love me a mugshot. She looks like the Hamburglar!

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